Non-Grunge 90s Rock

The Nineties…do you get a bad taste in your mouth when someone mentions this decade? It wasn’t all bad, but it seems pretty easy to be a hater. It was all about Seattle. You know, Starbucks, grunge, whale watching, and those type of things. Neil Young and his resplendent flannel couldn’t have been any more hip — or is it hipper? (Personally, I was a big fan Neil’s before the whole “Godfather of Grunge” thing. ) What was I doing in the Nineties? I spent some time and money at St. Louis Riverport Amphitheater and Busch Stadium trying to see as many legendary rockers who were doing their alleged-farewell tours — The Who, The Stones. I also saw Ringo Starr a couple of times as well. I even saw Neil Young on an acoustic tour.

Despite the whole grunge thing, there were some contemporary bands getting radio airplay on Album Oriented Rock (A.O.R.) stations. The band “Cry of Love” out of North Carolina had a couple of hits in the early 90s including one called “Peace Pipe.”

I always liked this song and their other hit “Bad Thing.” I did an internship at A.O.R. radio station in St. Louis around this time and wound up with Cry of Love’s album “Brother” on cassette — it also featured a K-SHE 95 sticker and station mascot “Sweet Meat” the sunglasses wearing pig. Pretty cool, huh? Cry of Love’s lead singer with the big bluesy voice was named Kelly Holland.

Around the same time (circa. 1993), K-SHE was also playing a bluesy rock song by another Southern band called “Brother Cane.”

“Got No Shame” is a great, frantic piece of rock n roll. Besides the wailing harmonica in it, I always liked the line “I found shelter, Helter Skelter”. Damon Johnson was the lead singer on this one. Many members of both bands went on to play with some other well-known bands/artists like The Black Crowes, Thin Lizzy, Sheryl Crow and more.

Are both bands considered “Southern Rock” because they’re from the South? I don’t know. I’m just grateful they threw some bluesy vocals and rockin’ music into all of that flannel.

Till next time, keep your Mojo on the Horizon!

Kiss + Doors = Pearl Jam

Somewhere along the way I heard the expression about all art being imitation — it might have been Greek philosopher Plato. In any event, I found an interesting case of this while researching the guitar style and solos of Ace Frehley. A little background first.

Frehley is, of course, best known for his role as lead guitarist of KISS — and also for having the coolest on stage persona/costume in the band: The Spaceman. (Everyone else in the band was doing black and white kabuki-styled makeup, but he went with silver and white, coupled with a self-proclaimed Flash Gordon influence, but I digress. )

Die-hard KISS fans know Gene Simmons and Paul Stanley were in a band called “Wicked Lester” before auditioning drummer Peter Criss and Ace Frehley to form KISS. One thing I recently learned is the KISS song entitled “She” was actually a composition from the Wicked Lester days. One WL version features a very groovy flute solo.

A few years later, KISS released the tune (written by Simmons and WL guitarist Stephen Coronel) on the album “Dressed to Kill.”

After looking on Wikipedia, I found out Ace Frehley listed The Doors’ tune “Five to One” as an influence on his take on “She.” Thank the nimble fingers of Robby Krieger! Fast forward a decade or so and Pearl Jam references the lick again in “Alive.”

No word on what inspired Krieger’s lick in “Five to One”, but Pearl Jam guitarist Mike McCready is apparently a big KISS/Ace Frehley fan so all is well. The real question is, if you put all of those band names together, what would be the best combo?

Wicked Pearl? Wicked Jam? Wicked Kiss? Wicked Doors? Kiss Jam? Door Jam (ha ha!)? Door Kiss?Door Wicked? Lester Pearl? Pearl Lester? Lester Doors? Pearl Doors? Kiss Lester? Lester Jam? Jam Lester? Jam Wicked?

Lester Pearl Kisses Wicked Doors? The possibilities are endless!

Till next time, keep your Mojo on the Horizon!

Superstore Run for Printer Ink

OK, I can admit I’m a bit of a procrastinator…not on everything, but on most things. This morning, I found myself out of black printer ink — again. (Naturally, I tried to milk the remaining ink from an old cartridge, but was denied.) This meant venturing out to my local superstore in the snowy weather. Unlike most people, I take the weather conditions into account when I drive. I’m actually aware of the fact that rain and/or snow, and/or a wintery mix can have an impact on driving and braking conditions. It was a relatively painless journey to the store at 6:45 am. ( I could have waited for the “office superstore” to open at 7:30 am, but I was done procrastinating.) Little did I know, the journey would raise some questions about man vs. machine in today’s U.S. of A.

Upon arrival, there were a couple of folks using mini-plows to clear the massive parking lot. I don’t know why, but for some reason, the 24/7 superstore only keeps one of its two sets of doors open during certain hours so I didn’t park in my usual spot. I made it to the electronics or “entertainment” department where the extremely valuable printer ink is kept behind lock and key. (Sub question: Is it possible one of the three wise men should have brought printer ink to Baby Jesus? I mean, do they keep the frankincense and myrrh under lock and key as well or is it near the Flintstone vitamins?) Unfortunately, there were no superstore employees in electronics. I was being denied my black printer ink cartridge after my wintery trek! I noticed superstore employees near the large metallic doors at the back of the store. Apparently, there must be a shift change at 7 am because employees were coming and going. A yellow vested lady told me “someone will be out shortly.” As I waited, I questioned my superstore trek at this point.

I decided to stand near the “entertainment” command post where they keep the cash registers and card scanners. The screen on the card scanner read “press for assistance” so I did. Nothing changed. Then another employee saw me and told me he’d “get someone from electronics.” I pressed it again. Finally, a third employee spotted me and took the initiative to visit the forbidden zone behind the large metallic doors. She emerged with a set of keys to free the printer ink from its vault. It’s a weird little lock on a large glass case, but the two of us persevered and the 245 XL ink cartridge was mine. Naturally, I had to take it to the self-scanning registers.

This raises the question…Have “the machines have taken over” a la The Terminator, etc. ? I mean the printer is the machine who started all of this. How long till it can just refill itself? Can’t it just spring legs or wheels and refill itself or maybe transform into a drone and fly there? Would using the superstore app have helped in this situation? I never use it because my cell phone is so dated it won’t work with any of those. You gotta love procrastination! In the meantime, I think someone should invent a little cow which holds your emergency ink cartridges. That way you can pull the extra cartridge right out of its udder.

Till next time, keep your Mojo on the Horizon!

How the Lynch stole Cinema

One quote pops to mind when I think about film director David Lynch. “I’m not gonna lie to you, it’s gonna get weird.” – Big Earl, Starsky & Hutch (2004).

Have you ever SEEN a David Lynch film? The word which always seems to define his films is “surreal”, which is great because… how else could you describe them? For example, I stumbled across a short film of his called “What Did Jack Do?” on Netflix. What is this seventeen minute effort all about? “In a locked down train station, a homicide detective conducts an interview with a tormented monkey.” Yep, it doesn’t get much more Lynchian than that.

I’d love to tell you I’m an expert on Lynch’s films, but I’m not. I’ve seen a few them: Blue Velvet, Wild at Heart, Mulholland Drive, and even The Elephant Man. He might best be known for the film and TV show Twin Peaks: Fire Walk With Me. I’ve seen the film and part of the series. What I always remember about it is the cool instrumental “The Pink Room” by soundtrack composer Angelo Badalamenti.

Back in the day, I remember going to a used record store to listen to the Twin Peaks soundtrack just so I could buy this one song.

Getting back to David Lynch films, they are unique, visually interesting, and pretty disturbing. There are dreamlike sequences involving midgets, cowboys, and in “Blue Velvet”, even Dean Stockwell lip-syncing Roy Orbison’s “Candy Colored Clown.”

Yes, that’s par for the course a la David Lynch. Is his goal simply to shock and/or disturb the audience? Are there deeper meanings to these surreal films that only some viewers get or does he purposefully leave them ambiguous and trippy? Beats me, but they certainly aren’t boring. The first time I heard of David Lynch was in college. A friend of mine with the moniker “King Couch Potato” told me about some of the weirdest films he’d ever seen. Those included Stanley Kubrick’s “A Clockwork Orange” and Lynch’s “Blue Velvet.” And, yes, they are pretty weird. Another college friend said the same thing about Lynch’s “Eraserhead.” I’ve yet to see this one, but I will.

In conclusion, here are some Lynchian questions to ponder. My answers are (in parentheses), but what do you think?

Q: If a tree falls in the forest, but no one hears it, does it make a sound?

(A: Yes– what are you stupid or something?)

Q: Why did David Lynch interview a monkey suspected of murder?

(A: Why not!)

Till next time, keep your monkey out of trouble and your Mojo on the Horizon!

The Scourge of Skidmore, MO

I remember hearing stories about the town bully that was served a lethal dose of vigilante justice. I was probably in middle school or junior high at the time, but I can still remember it. Years later, as a working adult, I remember a coworker of mine in the radio business re-telling the story as well. It sounds like folklore, but what happened in the small Missouri town is apparently true, and, truth is stranger than fiction.

Nodaway County sits along the Iowa-Missouri border and Skidmore’s population is estimated at less than 300. Picture dusty pickup trucks…farmland…and you’ll get the idea. In July 1981, the residents of Skidmore had enough of the “town bully” Ken McElroy. Picture an enormous dude (270 lbs.) with Elvis-like dark hair and pork chop sideburns. They also had enough of law enforcement’s inability to do anything effective about him. To put it in perspective, Wikipedia notes McElroy was “indicted 21 times”, but was only found guilty once — that was for shooting and injuring an elderly grocery store owner in Skidmore. (Apparently, there was some dispute about one of McElroy’s many offspring pilfering candy from the store.)

While McElroy was found guilty of the assault charge, he remained free pending his appeal. Soon enough, he allegedly took the time to make threats at the local pub with a WW II rifle and attached bayonet. That was the last straw for Skidmore residents. A large group of citizens met in a nearby legion hall, then entered the pub. As McElroy and his wife exited the pub and entered his pickup truck, he was shot dead. To this day, no one saw a thing.

This story is re-told by author Harry N. MacLean in the book “In Broad Daylight.” I haven’t read it yet, but today I watched the 1991 made-for-TV movie of the same name. The TV version stars Brian Dennehy as town bully “Len Rowan” and Marcia Gay Harden as his wife. A young Chris Cooper plays a state trooper as well. Cloris Leachman also has a supporting role. I found it on YouTube and have to say it’s worth watching. Dennehy plays arrogant very well and the story itself is pretty amazing.

There’s more to the story…allegations of witness intimidation, cattle rustling, mob lawyers, and much more. I found a “60 minutes” piece where McElroy’s widow and attorney both vouch for his moral character. Was justice served? You be the judge.

Till next time, keep your Mojo on the Horizon!

The Ongoing Electric Guitar Quest

The call of the guitar is a constant thing and the quest for more of them never stops. (Some musicians call it “GAS” Gear/Guitar Acquisition Syndrome). Why is that? For one thing, there are so many different brands and choices. Some electric players are Fender snobs while others are snob-o-RIFF-ic about Gibsons. (Personally, I play an Epiphone Dot Studio, but more on that later.) In the acoustic world, you could say the same thing about the brands Taylor and Martin. Don’t get me wrong, if you make your living with music, you need something reliable to get the job done ; however, it can take on a Bloods vs. Crips type of vibe.

I don’t make a living playing music and I’m a tightwad so making a split-second decision to buy a high dollar Les Paul, Stratocaster, Telecaster, or even Jaguar is not going to happen. My first electric guitar was a gift from my aunt and uncle. It was a black Westone http://www.westone.info/ with a Floyd Rose tremolo system. (Basically, it’s a device for keeping the guitar in tune.) It was a good guitar and I have good memories of jamming with friends and learning barred chords on it. Down the road, I bought a low end Telecaster copy (the Austin brand). It was black with a white pickguard. I think Bob Dylan played a similar looking Tele when he “went electric” and pissed everybody off in the process. I eventually sold the Austin Tele and grew tired of black guitars because I’d been there and done that. Plus, black Strats a la Eric Clapton (or lower end Squiers) are a dime a dozen.

I came across an intriguing semi-hollow electric guitar at a Best Buy store. Ironically, it was in the same shopping center as Guitar Center. (Apparently, Best Buy was test marketing musical instrument sales at that location. They closed that department after a year or so if I remember correctly.) The Epiphone Dot Studio appealed to me on several levels. First of all, it had a rootsy or classic vibe to it. It LOOKED like the guitars played by the likes of John Lee Hooker, B.B. King, and Chuck Berry. It had the classic “f” holes cut into it. Second, it was an affordable model and I’m a tightwad. Third, I liked the sound and feel of it. Novel reasons for considering a purchase! For awhile, the Epiphone Dot Studio in Alpine White was like my white whale or Moby Dick. They only produced them in white for a few years, but then they stopped. Eventually, I bought a used Dot Studio with a Dark Mahogany finish from Guitar Center. Pics really don’t do it justice. It’s a beautiful instrument.

Somewhere along the way, I also bought a solid body electric for 50 bucks. It’s a Dean Vendetta and also happens to have a mahogany finish. What I like about this model is it’s light as a feather! My experience on discussion boards is guitar snobs have universal disdain for the Dean brand. I’m not sure why, but it sure seems that way. Currently, this guitar is in pieces because I experimented with a different neck on it. It’s not that I didn’t like the current one, I just wanted to experiment with it. At one point, I raised the bridge on Dean to play some slide/bottleneck guitar on it. This guitar has a string-through body and tune-o-matic bridge. I feel this allows for great sustain, but some may think differently. Mark my words….The Vendetta and it’s bridge will both rise again!

So what’s next? I’m not really tired of the mahogany finish per se , but I’d say the weight of the guitar is one thing I’ve learned to take into consideration when buying — not only for playing time, but also for schlepping around your gear. Why be weighted down when you don’t have to be? Lately, I’ve been looking at another Epiphone model — the Les Paul Special I P90 in “faded TV yellow.” Man, that has a nice ring to it. (And, yes, it’s both lightweight and affordable.)

What does the type of guitar you play say about you as a person anyway? Does playing an expensive model make you a better player? It won’t if you suck. Recently I bought a very versatile, short scale Ibanez bass for a great price. During a jam, I was told it’s a “shredder” brand for, you know, metal heads. I disagree. Instruments are only as good as the musicians playing them. People judge one another based on how they present themselves. Guitars are no different.

Till next time, keep your Mojo on the Horizon!

Random Rockin’ Xmas

So many good Christmas songs…so little time. This is a fairly random list of songs I like with my fairly random thoughts on them:

“Silver Bells” – Dwight Yoakam: a fun, Tex-Mex romp
“Wrapping Paper” – The Waitresses: a very random 80s new wave thing
“Come On Christmas, Christmas Come On” – Ringo Starr: Gary Glitter thing
“Ding Dong, Ding Dong” – George Harrison: technically a New Year’s song, but it’s a good one.
“Peace on Earth/Little Drummer Boy” – Bing Crosby & David Bowie: a random collaboration of two very different singers from different generations
“Winter Wonderland” – Louis Armstrong – just heard this jazzy thing this year and loved it.
“Wonderful Christmastime” – Paul McCartney: I allow myself to get into the Christmas spirit the first time I randomly hear it
“Happy Xmas (War Is Over)” – John Lennon & Company: it’s simply great
“We Wish You a Merry Christmas (Reggae style)” – Jacob Miller & Ray I: Rastafarian St. Nick anyone?
“Little Saint Nick” – The Beach Boys – I’ve never been an enormous fan of theirs, but this song is one of the best holiday songs ever
“Step Into Christmas” – Elton John: it’s an original, upbeat song
“Jingle Bells” – Skid Row: it’s a punkish, rockin’ take on it
“We Three Kings” – Blondie: interesting vocals
“I Am Santa Claus” – Bob Rivers & Twisted Radio: LOVE this parody of Black Sabbath’s “Iron Man.” I shot and edited this video myself 🙂
“Merry Christmas from the Family” – Robert Earl Keen: glad to know that not everyone is politically correct
“Santa Looked A Lot Like Daddy” – Buck Owens: great cut from the mid 60s
“Merry Xmas Everybody” – Slade: underrated band and song. FUH -UHH- UHNNN.
“Snow Miser/Heat Miser” – this is from a TV special called “The Year Without A Santa Claus.” The composer is listed as Maury Lewis, writer Jules Bass, performers are George S. Irving and Dick Shawn. Reminds me of a Gene Krupa thing.
“Jingle Bell Rock” – Brian Setzer: good stuff
“Merry Christmas Baby” – Otis Redding: soul Xmas

Maybe there will be a Part Two!

Till next time, Happy Holidays and keep your Mojo on the Horizon!

Kung Fury

What do Nazis, dinosaurs, Vikings, and Miami-Dade cops have in common? The 80s action satire film Kung Fury. Don’t get me wrong, it’s an odd one, but if you have any appreciation for the likes of 80s era action films, it is a MUST SEE. Plus, it’s only a half-hour long. Apparently the film’s financial backing came via a Kickstarter campaign.

The 2015 film was directed by David Sandberg who also plays the epic, martial arts super-cop Kung Fury. The story line is ridiculously funny. KF has to go back in time to vengefully kill Adolph Hitler. (That’s after KF becomes “The Chosen One”. He was “hit by lighting and bitten by a cobra” or something like that. Naturally, he sports a reddish headband a la various 80s icons: Rambo, Loverboy’s Mike Reno, Johnny from the Cobra Kai Dojo, Olivia Newton-John, etc. )

Along the way, he gets some help from an ensemble of oddballs: Thor, two barbarian chicks, a computer geek called Hackerman, and his new partner named Tricera-cop. As random as it seems, the satire of the 80s is a big (and funny) part of the whole deal – video game arcades, enormous mobile phones, David Hasselhoff , and boomboxes to name a few. There are some big nods to Arnold Schwarzenegger via one-liners. I also felt the influence of Miami Vice and Tron as well. Plus, there is plenty of synth music.

If you were alive in the 80s, you owe it to yourself to see this film. I can’t tell you how many action movies I saw back then. You had Schwarzenegger, Stallone, Jean Claude Van Damme, and Steven Seagal to name a few action stars from the big screen. I wouldn’t call these guys action stars, but TV had the likes of Hasselhoff on Knight Rider and Don Johnson on Miami Vice. It’s funny to look back now at all of the computer-themed technology. (Yes, it really did look like that. ) The big thing I would says is we didn’t have the internet, streaming, or even blogging back then. We had to do something to keep ourselves entertained besides watching MTV. The best part of all is a full length film which is due to be released some time soon. It will feature some of those 80s icons like Schwarzenegger and Hasselhoff.

Till next time, keep your Mojo on the Horizon.

White Bike-Psych

The Sixties — more specifically the Summer of Love (1967) — produced some interesting art and music. To me, there’s something appealing about the whole psychedelic thing. Spirals, kaleidoscopes, vivid colors, and Indian-influenced music. Apparently the origin of psychedelic is supposed to mean “soul revealing” or “mind manifesting.” Whoa, man, that’s heavy. (For the record, the only acid I’ve ever “dropped” was the saclicylic kind — commonly known as Compound W — you know, plantar wart removal.)

In any event, I find it hard to separate the music and the imagery — maybe that’s because I enjoy them both. I thought about doing a list of my favorite or all-time best songs in this category, but decided to start with a hidden gem called “My White Bicycle” by a British band called Tomorrow.

The song has a definite trippy, Indian feel to it — thanks in part to the backwards instrumentation on it and the whispered echoes of “My White Bicycle.” (More about the origin of the song in a moment.) When you hear the words “white bicycle” you automatically get an image of one. Maybe that’s part of the appeal of the psychedelic thing, too — putting a trippy spin on something ordinary.

The first time I heard this song was riding in the car with my cousins at Lake of the Ozarks. It was on an 8-track tape with Nazareth’s harder rock version.

It’s a different interpretation from the original, but I’m living proof that Nazareth kept this song alive and spread it to the masses. Osage Beach, Missouri is a long way from Abbey Road (where Tomorrow originally recorded the song. Tomorrow featured a pre-Yes Steve Howe on guitar.)

Apparently the song was inspired by an Amsterdam anarchist outfit called The Provos. They wanted to alleviate traffic by leaving free, white bicycles at the disposal of their countrymen among other things.

If you don’t like the song or the psychedelic thing, hopefully, you’ll get a chuckle out of this novelty version featuring Neil the Hippie (Nigel Planer) from 1980s British TV comedy The Young Ones.

If you enjoy parody and/or psychedelia, you must seek out “Neil’s Heavy Concept Album.” Great title. “My White Bicycle” was written by Tomorrow band members Keith Hopkins and Ken Burgess. To put it into perspective, I even found pics of John and Yoko with a Provo White Bike.

Till next time, keep your Mojo on the Horizon.

Snack Cake Smackdown

If you put all of your favorite snack cakes into a wrestling ring for a battle royal, who would would be the last one standing? It’s a tough question, but one which absolutely bears discussion.

As an elementary school student, I would have no doubt said Hostess Cupcakes. Chocolate icing AND cream filling? Yes, please! Then, and now, I would probably put Little Debbie’s Star Crunch as an easy pick for one of the Top 5 Contenders. I was surprised to meet some adults my age who haven’t tried them. Blasphemy! For the uninitiated, Star Crunch is a chocolate covered rice cake with a caramel center. It should have come with a label — “Guaranteed to rip your braces and fillings right out of your mouth!” — but they are DELICIOUS! The beauty of them, like most snack cakes, is they’re just small enough to keep stuffing your face with them.

I’ve never been a big fan of Twinkies, but they’ve made it into some major motion pictures like “Die Hard” and “Zombieland” so you have to respect that. Back in the day, Hostess came out with something called Chocodiles — it was sort of like a chocolate Twinkie with some lame crocodile mascot on the box. Yes, I’ve eaten them, but I’d make Chauncy Chocodile a safe bet to be the first one tossed over the top rope. Other snack cakes which, personally, don’t do it for me include: Little Debbie’s Oatmeal Cookies and Nutty Bars along with Hostess Fruit Pies and Suzy Q’s.

Also on the yes list: Ding Dongs (Very tasty in mildly frozen form), Ho Hos and Little Debbie Swiss Rolls (Is there really a difference?), and I’m sure there are more. For example, there’s a brand called Bimbo which makes very tasty cupcakes and little pound cakes.

I would easily put Little Debbie Zebra Cakes in the Top 3. White icing with yellow cake and cream filling. Scrumptious! Not only that, but they come two to a package. It’s like they’re saying, “It’s OK, go ahead and eat them both.” It would be one heck of a steel cage match between Zebra Cakes and Star Crunch. Getting either one of those in my lunchbox could have been game changers as a youngster. (Incidentally, when I was in first grade I told an 8th grader to shut up for mocking my Space: 1999 lunchbox. It did kick ass.)

So what is #1 snack cake of all time?

It may sound like a bit of a wild card, but I would have to pick Hostess Coffee Cakes (Cinnamon Streusel) as my current favorite. Does that sound too uppity to the Zinger eaters and Moon Pie lovers out there? Well, TOO BAD!! They are snack CAKES after all. They are sweet. They are gooey. Plus, they’re packed with cinnamon. Not only that, but their ability to be gulped down one after another really clinches it for me. If you haven’t tried these three…please, FOR YOUR OWN SAKE, go immediately to the snack cake aisle and try them:

3. Little Debbie Star Crunch

2. Little Debbie Zebra Cake

Hostess Coffee Cakes Cinnamon Stresuel

You will thank me later!

Till next time, keep your Mojo on the Horizon!